Yesterday I found myself playing the piano. I sat down for a few minutes, and found myself still sitting playing an hour and a half later. The exercise left me feeling relieved. I actually use to be quite good on the piano, back when I practiced and trained regularly. It has been years since my peak and I have fallen a great deal. If I ever could have been called "talented" I'm afraid all I can manage now is "passable", but still it brings me a great sense of satisfaction and joy. I never have been great with emotion, so having a medium through which to purge it through has always been a great gift.
Yesterday, though, I was mostly fascinated with the way the music tasted. The unexpected tang of an augmented chord, the refreshing splash of an ending resolving itself, and the milky smoothness of unrelated notes blending together like potato salad. I think my favorite sensation though, is the thrill that the sounds that come out of my fingertips actually improve the silence. As someone with almost no artistic ability, I have learned a great respect for the blank page as I know that my additions only serve to mar the pristine whiteness of untouched paper. My heart sings, however, when the air is filled with sounds better than the quiet that proceeded them. I didn't create the sounds--I have masters with influences older than America to thank for that, but I am able to give life to their sounds--to do my tiny part to preserve their influences.
A verse of scripture I enjoy is 2 Nephi 9:51 which goes like this: "Wherefore, do not spend money for that which is of no worth, nor your labor for that which cannot satisfy. Hearken diligently unto me, and remember the words which I have spoken; and come unto the Holy One of Israel, and feast upon that which perisheth not, neither can be corrupted, and let your soul delight in fatness." Part of the reason that I like this combination of words is, of course, that it could be talking about chocolate with its terms of satisfaction, preservatives (things that don't perish) and delighting in weight gain but I especially love the idea of "delighting in fatness". There are some things that fill up my soul--the gospel, education, family, and music. I love things that make my soul grow bigger--things I can sink my teeth into. I love delighting in fatness!
I close with yet another not quite serious top 10 list: Why the piano is better than men
10-I can be a piano player whenever I like, when I am a player with men they tend to complain.
9- The piano may come with strings attached, but at least they can be tuned to my preferences.
8- When I am angry, I can beat on the piano all I want--it's not illegal.
7- I may have little hands, but they fit the piano just fine--not always easy to hold hands with guys whose fingers are thicker and longer than my baby ones, though I will admit that I defiantly enjoy trying...
6- The piano doesn't mind spending the evening with me when I'm PMSing.
5- I'm much better at communicating with the piano than I am with men.
4- I can play the piano in my PJs and sweats--don't need an uncomfortable outfit or even any makeup.
3- Pianos sound better than sweet nothings...usually. : )
2- Pianos don't mind a little neglect every now and then, they do well with clinginess also.
1- The piano is something easy for me to love--no mysteries, no hidden messages, no staying up late trying to guess what I should do next. Men have always been a mystery.
